I change the server.

I cut the head of the next user with a deadly broadsword that has been poisoned with jarrin root.

I use my super ninja decoy skilz and appear in a tree un injured

The user below Steps on a lego with a small hole in it which when

steped on fires a needle filled with ricen (Deadly Poision)

That is what it was supposed to do. However, during the manufacture of said weapon, they accidentally filled the needle with dihydrogen monoxide.

The next user is five meters from an exploding nuclear warhead. They have no superpowers, and Chuck Norris cannot save them.

i quicly manage to use StewieGriffin (bot) to defuse the bomb

The next user is sucked into a black hole with no way to escape

I am sent to an alternate universe where nutella is free.

The next user is shot by a squadron of various world war 2 airplanes

Luckily I had my trusty AA gun i carry around in my pocket just in case of this perticular occasion....

The next user has become the president of the Unite states and is now the world prime target for 304 nuclear long-range missles... WW3 has begun.

sadly they  sent test missles with concret insted of a warhead, hiting the ground leaving small craters.

The user below steps on a slug that ate a grenade :|

I step on the slug, nothing happened. The pin of the grenade wasn't pulled off.

I throw the next user into a active volcano.

Where I land on a ledge just out of sight and while getting 2nd degree burns, I escape to tell the tale.

The next user has C4 stiched to their chest, sticky grenades on their hands, legs, and face, then molten diamond poured down their throat... I think you know what happens next.

I then realise that molten diamond is not possible in earth's environment (diamond can't be liquid), and so this glitch in the laws of mechanics causes the universe to rewind to a few minutes before the cause of the glitch comes about. The universe is rebooted at 20:06, and I quickly run away to safety from the guy who is about to strap C4 and sticky grenades to my body.

The next user is skydiving towards a cloud of floating broken glass, with no parachute, and a 20-kilo block of lead attached to the legs.