On the next user that's beside me.

The next user has that giant mushroom on him.

I put the fire out - by opening the airlock allowing all of the air in the room to escape into space, before closing it and refilling the room with air.

The next user is swept out into space while the airlock was open.

And burned to death

Now you (the next user) are in the Hell

Thankfully, in life, I was good friends with Satan, and once he realizes the mistake we have a cup of tea.

The next user has CANCER. That guy from Mondo Medicals is here to show you what he does to cure CANCER. (Reposting, because the Mondo Medicals Guy SHOOTS CANCER. WITH BULLETS. People thought I meant they were dieing from cancer. "Curing" the cancer won't defend you from him.)

But your lack of sense causes it to fail

___________________________________________________

Next user becomes a computer and has System-32 deleted.

But it does not work for I am a mac and am already on fire.

The next user is a deer in hunting season.