Granted. I place you in a nuclear reactor as a neutron moderator.
I wish I could irradiate PacBrad with gamma rays.
Granted. I irradiate him for you and give him to you after mutating him.
I wish I had a gamma ray emitter that I could not be harmed by.
Granted. The power drives you insane and you smash it with a sledgehammer.
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I wish for a gun that shoots depleted plutonium.
Granted. You accidentally shoot me with the plutonium, which causes a mutation, so I hunt you down and kill you with my radioactivity.
I wish for a gun that shoots pure unbihexium. (element 126)
Depleted plutonium=Not radioactive.
All isotopes of plutonium are radioactive, not just Pu-239, which is the fissile isotope.
Granted. Your head explodes.
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I wish I could travel 2 years into the future.
Granted, but you land on yo mama!
I wish for a new letter in the mail.