But I am a robot who immediately coverts whatever I eat into energy that I can use.

I tie the next person to a bomb that explodes in 3 seconds (no immortal/Chuck Norris/fiction stuff)

Right before the virus has the ability to mess up me systems, I replace the CPU.

The next user is suddenly accelerated to the speed of light.

I wake up to a light bulb hitting my face.

The next user fell out of an airplane in space without a parachute.

Don't you think "fell" is too strong, since i "fell" from an airplane in space a parachute isnt needed, and i float to a space station.

The next user is a normal mortal human that doesnt have a unbreakable suit and is hit by a orbital laser of the space station in the head.

Edit: Kikkin is bad :( and I just wanted to see how is laser boiled blood.

@Kikkin (View Post)

 According to the rules on page 1, you are not allowed to simply "move out of the way".

Also, your post makes no sense.

The next user is infected with an undetectable virus.

The virus is unable to kill me.

The next user is infected with an undetectable deadly virus.