The song attempts to eat me, however it cannot materialize, thus it can't damage me.

The next user gets shot-at by the US navy with nuclear warhead equipped tomahawk missiles.

I managed to somehow redirect them to fly back at the people who launched them and detonate there.

The next user is falling into a black hole. You do not have FTL capabilities and cannot teleport, so escape is impossible since you have crossed the event horizon. In addition, as you fall deeper into the black hole, the gravity begins ripping you apart.

Turns out the black hole is actually a worm-hole. I get teleported to Earth before I get turned into human spaghetti.

The next user teleports with me, only that he teleports in the middle of the South Korea-North Korea DMZ in the present day. Not only will you get shot if you are noticed by any border guards, you'll also get mauled by the Asian Black Bear and the Korean Tiger.

My skin is indestructible.

The next player is a normal, vulerable, naked person with no gear or gadgets who is decaying in the other side of the universe, and nobody will find them for an estimate of 5000000 years.

On the other side of the universe, a planet identical to earth exists. In 5000000 years, the civilization on that planet will have enough technology to meet this earth.

The next user is suddenly accelerated to the speed of light, ionizing their body.

Nobody actually knows what happens when you reach the speed of light. There is no proof I would die. I just slow down time and slowly deaccelerate, unharmed.

The next user gets targeted by every single weapon of mass destruction on Earth and the cosmos.

Fortunately, I found a decaying wormhole to escape through. It collapsed seconds after I used it, resulting in all the weapons encountering each other and detonating. Unfortunately for the universe, this results in a lethal vacuum decay event that destroys absolutely everything, even the laws of physics.

The next user is about to be destroyed by the vacuum decay event.

I'm in an alternate universe.

The next user was following Michael238, but was too late, as the wormhole had already collapsed.

i created spacetime, the laws of physics and then I bent spacetime and escaped.

Next guy gets teleported beyond a blackholes event horizon and into the singularity

Fortunately, the blackhole was exploding and dying before I would even be teleported there because it wasn't dense enough to sustain itself for long.

The next user finds himself tied to a table about to be disemboweled and quartered for treason.