Granted, the entirety of mathematics is changed, breaking everything relying on it including computers so nobody gets to use them.

@thunder999 (View Post)
make wish.

You open it, and inside is a message saying:
Dear Vou-II, by the time you read this message you'll know what the following means:
LEARN HOW TO CORRUPT THINGS OR GET OUT

I wish for lemonade made out of noncombustible lemons.

@tudoreleuu (View Post)
But Aperture poisoned you lemons, causing you to die...
__________________________________________________
I wish for a portal gun...

But Black Mesa poisoned the inventors of the portal gun, they never finished the major glitch consisting of anyone entering the portal being desintegrated.

---

I wish OVER NIEN THOUSANAADDD POWARRR LEEVVALLZLZ ONNN MYYY SHOOPPP DAA WHAAWWWPPP GAWWWWNN (continuing with the theme, alot of ones and exclamation marks)

@tudoreleuu (View Post)
But reddit downvotes you into the firey pits of hell for spamming

I wish for a shooting star.

The shooting star is a meteor and hits you in the face

I wish Catelite manages to un-ban me from #powder

@Jackeea (View Post)
I do, but I don't even cupcake.

I wish I could fmkquofqefuibbu while qjdqejfeping a erjfejienf version enffeif.feufbe