I am a small black hole that is one millimeter across. I eat up your hand before consuming the rest of your body and moving on to another person.
The next user is my next target.
Small black holes happen all the time in Earth's atmosphere, but they simply dissolve out of existence. Your just another one of those short-lived black holes. Bu-bye.
The next user is trapped in a time-lock. (A TIME-LOCK PEOPLE! CAN'T DO NOTHING FROM THE INSIDE! :))
However, I am surrounded by a field of plasma, which causes your sword to melt from the heat, as well as get thrown back towards you. However, the plasma is so hot that it starts melting the ground that I am standing on, which causes me to fall through the ceiling of an underground bunker.
I fall on top of the next user, who is now being vaporized by the plasma as well as the lava that was made when the ceiling of the bunker melted.
The Universe implodes (delayed; as it seems) from the sheer impossibility of SuinDraw's post (@SuinDraw, do you even know what a time lock is!?!) and then the uinverse exists all over again but very slightly different in which Michael238 does not fall on me, I'm not being vaporized by plasma, and there is no lava. :)
The next user has no brain.
Because it is a different universe, humans don't have brains.
!set type next user's HEAD none
I just teleport out using super-advanced technology I stole from the 30th century.
The next user is trapped in a stasis field.
I am still generating a plasma field around myself, which grows brighter as long as the stasis field is maintained. However, the vast amount of trapped energy overwhelms the stasis field, causing a flash of light so bright that it instantly blinds anyone looking in my direction.
The next user was looking directly at me when the stasis field failed and is now completely blind.