However, I also have a sword, which I use to block your sword before stabbing you with it.

The next user is a neutron star in a slowly decaying orbit around another neutron star.

I am a neutron star and i die peacefully.

The next player gets sucked in by a black hole

I get sucked in by the black hole, but it turns out to be a wormhole, and transports me to the Moon. From there, I go to Earth.

The next user is right next to all the Francium there is in the world. A bucket of water has spilled all over it.

However, there is only a few grams throughout the world, so it just makes a little pop. Even the radiation from it is ignorable, since it is of the alpha variety.

The next user has been teleported into the rings of Saturn without any protection at all.

I am a black hole, so I suck the entirety of Saturn in. I get much larger and eat our solar system.

The next person has been swallowed by Jimmeh the black hole.

I get swallowed by Jimmeh the black hole and nothing happens

The next user is about to be killed by a assassin.

I'm a cat. I still have 8 lives left

The next user is a human 0.0000000000000000001 nanoseconds away from being killed by an assassin.

I am superman and i react within 0.0000000000000000001 nanoseconds to use my hidden blade and kill the assassin.

I am driving in a tank and shoot the next user

I am driving a tank with solid depleted uranium armor, so the bullet bounces off.

I shoot the next user with a miniature nuclear warhead, which instantly vaporizes its victims.

 I am 10 KM big so i dont even notice that warhead

I crush the next user with my foot(1KM)