@Master Wish granted. You spill it on your foot and break a couple bones. 

 

I wish I was dead.

Granted. I throw your body into a wormhole, where it travels back in time and emerges to hit you preventing you from dying which prevents me from throwing your body into the wormhole in the first place.

 

I wish that I lived on Mars.

You now live on mars, But you lack the requirements to "live" there.

 

I wish the user below me complimented me.

@mr--slashlash (View Post)

 I compliment you by giving you a million dollars in Monopoly money.

 

I wish that I had some antimatter in a bottle.

The bottle melts, The antimatter scatters and melts everything it touches.

 

I wish I was bill. From left 4 dead.

@mr--slashlash (View Post)

 The computer you are on crashes, killing you since your in the game.

 

I wish I had a remote-controlled nuke.

Wish granted, You drop the remote and it lands on the button, But the nuke exploded into rainbows and kittens.

 

I wish I was beautiful

Granted. You spend so much money to be beautiful that you go broke.

 

I wish that I had a block of 100% pure gold.

@Michael238 (View Post)
the block is the size of a grain of sand
____________________________
I wish I could talk to computers like mica from heroes

@OnTheToilet (View Post)

 The computer you're talking to suddenly says: "We are the Borg. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile.

 

I wish I had an infinitely long winter break from school.