Granted. I pooped on it.

I wish that cookies didn't need so much butter.

Granted.In fact,they don't even need butter.Now they need gold instead.Lots of gold.

I wish that I could smell nice.

you smell nice in your terms, but repel others by your smell

I wish I wasn't here.

Granted. Someone hacks your computer and now your computer is destroyed. Now you can't be here. ;)

I wish that Xetalim wasn't such a downer and became nicer, but not too nice or awkward.

Granted.Another,even meaner user takes his place and gives everybody permanent depression.

I wish I had a better computer.

Granted. I poop on it. :)

I want to come up with better corruptions than pooping on people's things.

You get a new computer with awesome everything, however the computer company forgot to put in a heatsink.

The computer bursts into flame and explodes.

lol Schneumer, you beat me to it. :P

You now pee on everyone's things.

I wish I had all the PC games in the world and a computer that could run them at over 9000 FPS.

Granted. However, the cooling system on the computer is extremely efficient because it releases the thermal energy in the form of gamma rays. Enjoy your radiation poisoning.

I wish that thorium was much more common.

@Schneumer (View Post)

 My computer is fixed.

@Michael238 (View Post)

granted, but its uses are less, and you become uninterested in it.

I wish I could fly.

Granted. You jump off a cliff. The ability to fly lasts for 3 seconds, and you fall and die.

I wish that I understood what lefouduroi meant by "My computer is fixed."

Edit: I wish i could lose weight, but not too much, just right.